I have a keen sense when it comes to couples, a very strong observation for every couple who was near me. It does not matter whether I know them or not. They are sitting in a fancy restaurant, standing on roadside, riding on a bike or gossiping while eating some street food. There are many couples around us. in our families too. I used to observe how they see each other. they treat each other. how they care for each other. small things just like that.
When someone is in love, it’s all in the air. You just want to see the good qualities of the man you are falling for. In other words, he or she is the most beautiful, perfect, caring, and loving person you know on this planet. meanwhile. honest and loyal one too. please consider these adjectives at the top most.
However, with time, things came back to normal routine. Yes, you love each other but now you are busy with your routine and daily chores. You have a work to do. a life to live. The person for whom you are available 24/7 and express your feelings every time. You don’t hesitate to love them and express your love for them. But with time, the ego starts eating your love and at end your ego became a giant Infront of your love. You don’t want to express yourself that much, something hinders. You are getting irritated by the same lovey dovey talks your partner wants to do. You may think that the person who is expressively sharing his feeling is not creative, productive or don’t have any sort of work to deal with. You are the only person who is actually busy with all sort of work in the world.
In initial days of falling in love, you are above the sky and at the end you are not even on the ground you are shattered, broken, and very much below the ground. The person whom you admire for all the love and good qualities is just a bundle of all the evil in the world whom you don’t want to live with or even can’t breathe in his presence.
Don’t you think that is a very common scenario? Every second couple around me is in fantasy of something they don’t have. They all are very lovey dove but with time they got the idea that their spouses are not of their match and the one with their friend or relative is the ideal. The process of idealization of the couple near us is very much normal. Another thing I notice and is very irritating or shocking for me is that now-a-days couples don’t accept or respect privacy of each other. When you are sitting inside a circle of your peers, friends, or it is a family gathering, any time a person cracks a joke. a lame joke about his or her partner. they are mostly jokes about married person or life. like how beautiful their life was when they were single and now how trapped they feel. Why? Don’t we have some better sense of humor? Why we don’t respect the privacy of the other person? In case of females, they are getting a breadwinner who is providing them with everything they should be grateful for! In case of males, they are getting a beautiful family, children, a wife who is making their house a home. It’s a mutual bond not just based on love but on respect too.
But when we start our journeys, we prioritize love over everything but with time, our instincts demand privacy, space, respect, and praise may be. Small gestures of love and compassion. A smile when we see one another. A candle light dinner once a while. A cozy evening to listen each other. Every time, it’s not about how you feel, sometimes, there is need to understand how other one feels and what he/she expects from this relation or bond.
The deteriorating concepts of a happy and healthy relationships, marriages as they are falling apart. I have seen many couples who smile at each other in public and they are alien to each other for the rest of their life. They are just machines who are living their lives with no emotions. They are together for the sake of their children or their family or for their reputation in society.
I guess we are in dire need to understand the need to prioritize things. Next time, when you are falling for someone, judge how he/she understands not only you but others too, how he respects, care, talk and at the end love. Love is not everything. It will happen again and again and again. There are very rare cases of you being ROMEO and Juliet, Her Ranjha, or Sassi panno, and believe me my dear you are not in that much love. If you want to remain in love, want to sustain your relationship, you have to take steps slowly. Don’t be haphazard with things, enjoy the process, take some time to understand each other. No one is perfect but with love, respect and understanding you can develop a perfect bond. That is something, actually matters!








